Year 6's blog

Welcome to Ms Lovell's blog at Reay Primary School!

100 Word Challenge time! Please also comment on other people’s writing. Why is it good? How could it be improved?

on March 1, 2014

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8 responses to “100 Word Challenge time! Please also comment on other people’s writing. Why is it good? How could it be improved?

  1. Ishan says:

    It was fabulous! They flew across the dance floor, moving so fast it was almost a blur. Beauty stopped it from being just that. Their moves raced the rhythm. They jerked and jolted like raging bulls. Ferociously infectious, they drew the attention of all nearby, calling them to join in with party! There was no escaping the stylish movements of this new dance ; The Lindyhop!

  2. Ishan says:

    Well done samuel that’s great!

  3. taona says:

    In the 1920 a lady named Josie is a professional dancer from America no one knew what this dance was called. Her dance partner Sammy Jones didn’t even know what its called until one day she reviled it in a press conference.
    “It is called…” she announced “Lindy hop.”
    Everyone paused. Then, they cheered because now there is a name which everyone who learns the dance can name. Lindy hop was then the most popular dance In history. Josie is married and watching videos her dancing the Lindy pop.
    “I was Lindy popping, I was Lindy hopping” said Josie.

  4. jamal says:

    good use of exclamatry sentences at the end lena

  5. lena says:

    Dear dairy,
    It had been brilliant dancing with Samantha but later on I heard her whisper the words of a witch to her friend Stella “he’s surly the worst dancer in the country maybe even the entire world! a chimp can dance better than him”. My heart was broken, now hearing those words in my head again and again my heart is torn in to pieces. If she wants hate I’ll give her hate! I thought we had a connection a connection of love. The grin on her face is now a grin of evil. How could she? Payback time!

  6. Tilly says:

    That’s a really good piece of writing Samuel, a good use of ellipses.

  7. Samuel says:

    My drawn-in eyes were conscious of nothing else, she was twisted and twirled round, and round. Who was to know how extraordinary Lindy Hopping could be? I was almost certain that they’d end up on a heap on the ground, but somehow, they didn’t. They were flying through the air so energetically that it felt impossible. It was utterly crazy: it made my fingertips and feet twitch and twitch…

    Even though only minutes had passed, everyone had hit the dance floor and it had urged me to as well. I couldn’t wait to go crazy in this amazing world.

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